Crowborough Town Council.

Well fuck me we are all lucky people to be living in a town with free trade status whatever that means.
I always thought that free trade was a hairbrained scheme thought up by socialists to help the local warlords in far off lands to buy extra AK47s on the back of us buying shit tasting chocolate or coffee.To be honest my opinion hasnt changed a bit and the arrogance of the councillors is unbelievable in them thinking that if they drink shit coffee it will somehow make a difference to the status of Crowborough.
The council seems to be on a power trip at the moment and has decided that the little matter of elected representatives on the council can be overlooked if it means getting the right type of person on the council.They are now looking for another councillor to be co opted onto the council without any vote.
The advert says
"CASUAL VACANCY
JARVIS BROOK WARD
TO BE FILLED BY CO-OPTION
IF YOU WOULD LIKE TO BE CONSIDERED TO BECOME A TOWN COUNCILLOR PLEASE APPLY TO THE TOWN CLERK FOR AN APPLICATION FORM.
COUNCIL MEETING ON TUESDAY 19TH JANUARY 2010 7.30pm TO WHICH YOU WILL BE INVITED.

What the advert should say is...

"Anyone can apply but unless you attend the right golf club or trouser legging lodge you dont stand a chance because we dont want your sort upsetting the applecart.Special dispensation will be made in order to fasttrack you onto the council if you have attended a Common Purpose NLP course and have a history of working for a public sector employer as a drone.Anyone that doesnt exhibit newspeak and PC thoughts will be labelled an extremist and barred from being a councillor.
We are an equal opportunity employer but as you all know some piggies are more equal than others (oink oink)."