Martin Richards-overpaid and overdue for the chop.

Sussex Police, which last month announced plans to axe 500 front-line officer posts, pays chief constable Martin Richards a salary of £144,510.


Nearly 150K to sit around doing nothing other than using public facilities to network with his fellow common purpose graduates!!!
Useless public servants used to be moved sideways into a job like being in charge of paperclips or similar where a fuck up would have no impact on the public.These days useless individuals like Martin Richards are given senior positions and a sack full of money to actually fuck up the public service they are nominally in charge of.

Roll on elected chief constables and we can hopefully wave goodbye to socialist social engineering common purpose graduates twats like Richards for good.

Mind the door on the way out Richards.

There follows a profile of a man that has not done a days proper policing work in his whole career.He started as a graduate recruit and went straight into senior positions with Warwickshire Police , within twelve years he became CC of Wiltshire and lucky old Sussex was next in line for his common purpose improvement by destruction method of running a Police service.

The fact that he doesnt know one end of a Police car from another doesnt stop him poncing around in his top of the range BMW (why does he need those blue lights in the grille).All in all a useless waste of oxygen who gets paid way too much for his well hidden talents.



Martin Richards became Chief Constable of Sussex on 1 October 2007.




After graduating from Bristol University Martin joined Warwickshire Police in 1982, serving across all geographical areas in the Force.



His command positions included District Commander at Nuneaton, Head of Communications, Performance Review Manager and a short period as Head of CID. He served for two years in National Police Training as Head of Recruit Training Centre at Ryton-on-Dunsmore.



He achieved a Masters in Criminology at Cambridge University before being promoted to Assistant Chief Constable at Avon and Somerset Constabulary in 1998 where his key responsibilities were Personnel and Training, Criminal Justice and Communications. He was promoted to Deputy Chief Constable in 2002, taking on responsibility for Professional Standards, Corporate Development, Communications and Information Services.



He is the Chair of the National Training Managers Group and represents the Association of Chief Police Officers on the Police Dependants’ Trust. He has recently overseen the national implementation of IPLDP – the new programme of training for all recruits accepted into the Service.



Martin was appointed Chief Constable of the Wiltshire Police in September 2004. During his time in this post he oversaw ‘Optimus’ a 12 month programme of modernisation and reform within the Force. He was also the Chief Officer lead on collaboration for all five Forces within the South West region.

Sussex Police -operation crackdown.

Sussex Police have had a well deserved kicking over their  stasi inspired operation crackdown initiative whereby members of the public are encouraged to grass up people they dislike under the pretence of reporting poor driving standards.

Sussex Police are keen to ponce around Brighton proclaiming  how much they enjoy taking it up the tailpipe but seem to have abdicated any responsibility for doing any proper policing.

We are being constantly told how dangerous Wealden roads are and how speeding contributes to most accidents (both lies by the way) but when it comes  to cracking down on dangerous drivers they are just not bothering to do anything.Sussex Police roads unit are notoriously lazy and cant be bothered to stop people driving in a dangerous manner lest they have to actually do some work.Much better(for them) to stay put in their nice new BMWs and wait for the ANPR to ping or to stay at the nice warm station sending out PCNs for people doing 43 in a 40 limit.

Poor driving is to blame for most accidents not speed so by concentrating on speed cameras they are completely missing the point on road safety by a country mile.A nutter driving like an idiot or someone driving pissed are pretty much guaranteed to have an accident and hurt someone else but the Police are not interested unless a member of the public spoon feeds them the exact details of the person and car .As long as the pissed/nutter driver drives within the speed limit  and his car is legal he will probably get away with it.
Whilst the plod is sitting around using the ANPR as a cash generating machine they are unlikely to be spotting the person tailgating,overtaking dangerously or just acting a cunt because they are unlikely to be doing this in view of a staionary plod car.The truth is that someone travelling 10/15mph over a speed limit will 99% of the time not hurt anyone or cause damage to anyone or any property but are treated with zero tolerance by our
useless Police .People driving dangerously or without care and attention are guaranteed to cause an accident or damage to someone or someones property at some time but are not targeted by the Police because it would require more than sitting around eating doughnuts and waiting for the ANPR beep to wake them up from their semi slumber to do something about it.

Operation crackdown perhaps should be renamed operation breakdown because the repect that people had for the Police has certainly broken down as a result of initiatives such as this which was thought up by some shiny arsed common purpose graduate in between wanking off over a stasi instruction  manual.

Just as an aside

Sussex Police have updated their website so its all user friendly and shiny (like their BMWs)but basically useless (like them)but have retained the scrapped policing pledge-are they useless twats or what.

Anita Kerwin-Nye has left the council.

Anita Kerwin-Nye one of the few elected councillors on Crowborough Town Council has left/resigned from the council leaving a vacancy to be filled by another unelected co opted nobody.

Anita was one of the very few decent people on the council and although I have gently ribbed her over a couple of things I thought she was/is a genuine nice person who was trying to do her best for the people of the town.

This means we have now have only 5 elected councillors out of a total of 15 which highlights just what a sham the council is.

Wealden Council -officially fairly useless.

I think its accepted that Wealden Council are pretty useless at everything other than making a mess up of everything they come into contact with.
Even the Audit Commission could only give Wealden a fair marking which in the outside world would be the equivalent of crappy crap crap shit level of service.

I had to laugh when I got an invite from Wealden to a business breakfast at the Buxted Park Hotel to explain to us plebs how to use social medjia at a cost of £10 a head.

I am not sure how many people attended because I thought I could more constructively use the 2 hours and didnt bother going .This seems typical of wealden in that they as public servants think they know more about everything than people who actually earn a living by doing something useful rather than harrassing people who leave their bin open an inch .

Why anyone would want to take advice about marketing from a public service organisation that by the Audit Commissions (very very low) standards can only achieve a "fair" is beyond me.

Typically when you check out the dire Wealden website there is no twitter feed or any mention of facebook at all so how could they possibly give advice to people about using social medjia when they dont use it themselves.Oh I forgot Wealden doesnt need to market themselves because they get squillions of pounds handed to them on a plate to add to the squillions that they take off the public and businesses of Wealden under the threat of jail if  they object.

Wealden and fucking useless go together like their £10 egg and bacon breakfast.

Sussex Police -soft on crime, tough on plane spotters.

Sussex Police are  on a bit of a power trip at the moment.Given that they face huge cuts in their budget you would think that they would concentrate on their core service of serving and protecting the general public by catching crims .That would be too easy for plod though wouldnt it and would involve those involved in front line services actually doing something useful rather than just sending out speeding tickets and issuing cautions.
Sussex Plod have decided  that although ID cards have been scrapped there is a group within the county that needs monitoring and registering lest they cause mayhem.
The group I am talking about are not the mussies or pikeys but plane spotters.Yes the Police want plane spotters at Gatwick to "voluntarily" register their details with them so they know who they are and when asked they are to produce a special plane spotters ID card. Although not a plane spotter myself I have taken my kids up to the viewing platform many times(before it was closed) to watch the planes take off and land.I have come across many plane spotters and none of them seem to be a threat to anyone nor a very good deterrent against a hardened alki aida attack.
So what stasi twat thought that registering plane spotters and giving them an ID card which they must produce when asked was a good idea.That person is Richard Griffiths of Gatwick Police station who should have an ID card with twat written across it in huge red writing just in case anyone was in any doubt .
Who in their right mind is going to give the Sussex rossers their personal details so they can be held on some secret database managed by the like of the clinically insane Mr Griffiths to do with as he pleases.

Are we truly free ?

Crowborough Town Council.

Keeping an eye on Council meetings is like watching a car crash in slow motion.

The incompetence of the members of the council is staggering and the arrogance as to be seen to be believed.The cock up on appointing a new town clerk seems to go on and on.The position has now been taken off the temporary town clerk and given back to the old town clerk on a temporary basis paying her an amount of £30 per hour plus expenses.Fucking hellski I thought she was a mere town clerk not a senior manager in a private business.

On another hilarious note the council seems to be trying to force the members and staff to be CRB checked to accertain whether they are child molesters or not.Why councillors or council staff need to be CRB checked is not clear but they are having a hissy fit because one unamed person is refusing to be CRB checked.
The council is now trying to change the persons contract retrospectively in order to force them to comply with this dictat.Hang on a minute-councillors are not people who can be hired and fired these are supposed to be elected representatives.Ignoring the co opted twats like "poor old" clive wilson some members have actually been voted in and it is not for the council to decide whether someone should take part in the council just because they dont want to go through the farce of having to get a certificate to prove they are not a child molester.
The unamed member who is refusing to have a CRB check either has something to hide or they are making a stand against this disgusting piece of legislation and the heavy handed implementation of it by their fellow councillors.I would like to hope that the reason for refusal is more the second one rather than the first one but who knows.

What is even more disgusting is that the chairman of the personnel commitee is none other than our friend and non elected twat Damian McAlonan.He has got a fucking cheek implementing "the rools" when he wasnt even elected onto the council and he has the bare faced cheek to put on his professional profile that he is an elected councillor when he clearly isnt.Clearly lying is acceptable whilst opting out of a witch hunt clearly isnt.

Kent Police-scared of their own shadow.

Whenever I consider just how shit our local plod is it always surprises me that just across the county border there is a Police force even more shit than Sussex.

Kent Police are not known as the KP nuts for nothing.

The latest farce to be enacted by the KP nuts is just typical of the Police in general where they see offences everywhere when dealing with law abiding members of the public but turn a blind eye to real criminals committing real crimes.

In Tunbridge Wells a man was having trouble breathing so he rightly called for an Ambulance.

When said Ambulance crew arrived rather than tending to the poor patient they saw fit to have a look around his flat (elf n safety assesment no doubt).Whilst having a look they came across a BB gun (yes you can guess what happened next cant you).The Ambulance crew left and promptly called up the KP nuts saying that the person had a gun.Kent Police true to form went way over the top and held siege to the poor mans flat for 5 hours whilst he was asleep and oblivious to what was going on outside.The first thing he new was PC knuckledragger and several robocops kicking in the door and arresting him for posession of a firearm.

Firstly it is perfectly legal to own a BB gun (I have several) and there is no requirement to store them in a secure place,similarly you can own deactivated guns quite legally.The person was not committing any crime by having a BB gun in his own home but that didnt stop the Police from treating him like a criminal .Wouldnt you think that once the Police had established that the gun was a BB gun and perfectly legal to own they would have  apologised and sulked off with their tail between their legs.Bad enough that they kicked the guys door in they then proceeded to arrest him and took him down to Tunbridge Wells interrogation centre where they bailed him pending further enquiries.

Jeez before I let anyone in my house I had better hide my collection of deact guns and BB /air guns because some public sector plankton might think I am the first white christian jihadist.Just to make sure I had also better hide my sons toy guns and his action man unless the Police think we have a battalion of mini plastic terrorists hiding in the house.

Pakistan floods.

Paki stan is suffering from terrible floods at the moment and the bleeding heart brigade are out in force to make us feel guilty enough to give money to the poor drowning Pakis tanis.

Before handing over your hard earned money just bear in mind that a few weeks ago Paki stan was all for breaking all ties with us because David Cameron dared to speak the truth and accuse Paki stan of being actively involved in sponsoring global terrorism.A couple of weeks later the heavens open and they are begging us to give them money.

Consider these facts from  http://grumpyoldtwat.blogspot.com/


"Just out of interest you might like to know that China have recently bunged Pakistan $200 million to help support their space program. Oh, and only 10 days ago the Pakistan Prime Minster said that Pakistan will never compromise on it's $2 billion nuclear program".


So there you go Paki stan has plenty of money but they just choose to use it on other things rather than help their own people when in need.If their own government cant be arsed to provide aid then why should we ,charity begins at home after all.I will have to look up and see how much overseas aid we got when Cumbria was struck by floods last year,I am pretty sure it will be the square of fuck all and that is what I am going to give to the Paki stani aid fund.

Speed Cameras kill .

Authorities all over the country are deactivating their scameras because they cost money to run now the councils dont get a kickback percentage of the fines levied.

It started with Swindon and now authorituies all over the country have decided they cant be arsed to run speed cameras which rather exposes the lie that these cameras were road safety devices that daily save the lives of ickle children who would otherwise be mowed down in their thousands by people doing 80 on the motorway.If these scameras were installed purely to prevent accidents then surely the councils would continue to operate them at a loss in order to save lives of ickle children wandering around in the middle of the road.
This is where the pro camera argument falls flat because the second the money stops pouring into the council coffers the cameras are switched off.What has also screwed the pro camera looneys is the fact that in Swindon the number of accidents and fatalities have  decreased since the cameras were removed meaning that the cameras actually caused more accidents and fatalities than they stopped.

Predictably all the little hitlers from ACPO (private company) are going overboard with the misinformation that our roads are going to resemble a demolition derby because the scameras are gone.As for the little wankers that work for the scamera partnershits they had better start looking for proper jobs to do because the great speed camera scam has hit the buffers .Once the speed camera genie is out the bottle and people realise that accident rates have decreased by scrapping them there is no way ACPO(private company) and the scamera partnershits lies will ever be believed again.

Sussex Police who run the Sussex Scamershit will eventually fall into line when they run out of money and have to choose between Speed Cameras and new BMWs for everyone.Perhaps  Sussex Police will eventually realise that the trust that the public had in the Police has gone due to their quite discraceful war on motorists when murderers and rapists walk the street.The Police for too long have viewed the law abiding driving public as a cash cow to milk at every opportunity.Driving at a few miles an hour over the limit is not a crime its just a breach of an arbitary limit set by some jobsworth who thought that reducing a speed limit from 50 to 30 would be a good idea because it would mean more fines.Contrast the way motorists are treated with the way real criminals are treated and you get some idea how low our Police Farce has fallen over the last decade or so.The Police need a rocket up the arse to get them to tackle the real criminals in society rather than sitting around pressing buttons on a computer issuing illegal fines to people whilst tucking into their favourite doughnuts.If they spend half the time and effort in tracking down real criminals as they do harrassing motorists our towns and cities would be crime free.Realistically thats never going to happen is it because the Police are no longer a crime fighting force but an equal opportunity diverse organisation that prefers to ponce around Brighton with a bunch of gayers rather than tackling crime .

Clued Up-Childhood stealing bastards.

According to someone in the know there is a plague of nearly biblical proportions among the young in Crowborough.Chlamydia and other STD infections among  young adults is rising year on year in the Crowborough area .
How can this be when we have sexual health rammed down the throat of kids from the age of 13 and organisations like Clued Up actively promoting contraception among the youth of Crowborough .

Well the problem is that Clued Up and Yoof Workers  encourage children (youths under 18 are children) to be sexually active and simply do not explain the risks let alone the law.The lefty yoof workers
solution is to sterilise girls from the age of 14 by arranging for  them to have a contraceptive implant fitted.
This obviously prevents them from getting pregnant but the problem is that the lefty lezzy social worker types then encourage the young girls to have illegal underage sex and sleep around because they cant get pregnant.Being mostly lesbians or fudge shovers the yoof workers havnt really got a grasp of normal reproduction and cant seem to understand the basics of sex among opposite sexes.
Having a contraceptive implant doesnt prevent any STD and only encourages young people to be sexually active from a younger age.Having sex at a young age is illegal because it is harmful and Clued Up which is run by the Youth development service of ESCC are real bastards for allowing our children to be exposed to deseases like chlamydia,HIV etc etc but they are even more bastards by arranging implants for children without consulting or even telling parents.To compund the offence the bastard cunts dont even explain the risks to the youngsters when they arrange their sterilisation and as the parents dont know sensible intervention is just not available.If parents try to do the right thing by trying to convince their kids that holding off having sex until they are over 16 and only then as part of a stable relationship they quickly realise that they are onto a loser.The school,connexions and organisations like Clued Up will be actively encouraging them to have sex under 16 and encourage our children to sleep around and to hell with the consequences so the parents are outgunned from the start.
The result of this madness is that our children are forced to grow up quicker than they should and the girls are being pumped full of hormones from the age of 14!!!.Over the years youngsters especially the girls will grow up regretting the fact that they didnt listen to their parents because they were indoctrinated by a bunch of left wing morons.When these young girls grow up and face the prospect of infertility and a dramatically increased risk of cervical cancer they will regret that they listened to Clued Up and the rest.My advice to you if you have children is to make sure you get your advice in first and for gods sake keep them away from clued up or any other similar family hating, childhood stealing,life ruining organisations.

Is it any wonder that kids (especially girls) are slashing themselves to bits and even attempting suicide when their minds and bodies are being fucked in this way up by a bunch of lefty retarded homo twats.

Clive Wilson unelected member taking the piss with our money again.

Clive Wilson unelected member of the town council is squealing like a stuck pig because co opted (unelected) members are not able to claim members allowances.Poor old Clive we all feel very sorry for you NOT.
We all know he has no interest in the people of Crowborough and is only on the council to further feather his own nest so why should he receive the allowance.

He managed to get planning permission for his 10 bedroom mansion on the edge of the Ashdown forest (which incidently is still a bloody great hole in the ground) when no one else would have done and he is also
heavilly involved in the unloved and unwanted Community facility that the Town Council has underwritten to the cost of 3.5 million and rising.

So my advice to you Clive is stop crying like a baby over a few quids allowances and get on with your job.

Clive Wilson is clearly the sort of person that shouldnt be on the council in the first place simply because he hasnt been voted in and got his position because of some potentially dodgy back room deals with the other councillors.The fact is that he has managed to get a seat on the council in a non democratic sort of way and he is trying to justify it by getting us to pay him an allowance for being there is an extreme case of taking the piss.

Wilson runs his own eco shite building design company(absolutely nothing to do with the community facility of course) he must be a bit mental because he  wants the council (taxpayer) to provide him with a free wi fi enabled laptop.Well Clive get off your fat backside and stop troughing for a bit and get yourself down to PC world and buy one from your own ill gotten gains like the rest of us have to.

The trouble is Wilson is so far up his own arse that he will not even allow a picture of his face to appear on the Town Council Website.He thinks that if people dont recognise him then he will not have to deal with the plebs ,and their problems, which he has (not) been elected to represent.To help people to identify this trougher I have managed to find a picture that purports to be him.Personally I think its been mislabelled and it is in fact Clive Dunns father.Dont Panic!!!.

                       #######################UPDATE#####################

Poor old Clive likes to think he is a proper town councillor even though he has not been voted in and has been poncing around as a co opted adviser on planning applications for years.

Is it legal then that p.o.c is also offering a service to help people get planning permission in Crowborough.

Check out this http://www.domicilecrowborough.co.uk/planningapplicationscrowborough.html.
Even if it is legal there is the stench of corruption and dodgy dealings about it.I will be checking out some of the recent planning application in Crowborough to see if  p.o.c has been party to any of these decisions at Town Council level.

Dangerous man with a gun in Northumberland.

Is it just me or is there something very wrong about this picture.

What is the muppet with the gun actually doing pointing a loaded gun  at innocent civillians.

Cunts like this shouldnt be let anywhere near a grease gun let alone a semi automatic weapon.

I ask again what the fuck is he doing.For the mongtards who say "someone could be hiding in the boot"-its a Corsa ffs and no way could you get a midget in the boot let alone a huge man carrying a gun.

I tell you if that was me in the car I would make a formal complaint against that plod because he is clearly a danger to himself and the public.

Do they only employ idiots in the Police force oops sorry service these days and then make it worse by giving them firearms.

Mela Tunbridge Wells.

The Tunbridge Wells Mela is being promoted in the local area.

One of the selling points is that its free which means I assume all these "we value diversity as long as its not English" performers are doing it for nothing and all the organisers are doing it for nothing so we can all live together it harmony.

If you look a bit deeper you will find that actually the Mela is paid for by public sector organisations and rather sinister government funded organisations like cohesion plus.So in fact the taxpayer is paying for it all.
I am sure these organisations listed below that hand over public money are not doing it for the goodness of their heart.This event is a brainwashing exercise to make sure that everyone thinks and acts the way the liberal PC bedwetters want them to.So if you want to be told how to think then by all means go along and enjoy the Albanian Lesbian dance troups and dont let it worry you in the least that the taxpayer has paid for that dog kebab you are eating.Its a fact that anything the public sector arranges is shit-think back to the crappy PC millenium dome fiasco .
Perhaps the strap line  for the Mela should be come along and be brainwashed at the taxpayers expense.
Hopefully this will  be the last Mela if the Local Government cuts are as deep as they should be.I wouldnt be so sure though I can see the council meeting now.
"Right comrades we have lost half our budget and we have to make deep cuts in all Departments .Obviously our pay and perks are ringfenced so we will have to find savings elsewhere.The choice today  is shall we continue with rubbish collections or shall we continue withy the rubbish Mela.Well thats sorted then the rubbish collection service will be scrapped-those racist Tunbridge Wells white people dont deserve it anyway.If the poor oppressed Africans can live it their own shit then why cant the racist English.
Finally lets finalise the line up for Mela 2011-I believe Abu Hamza is free on that day and I understand he has some very interesting ideas about diversity and tolerance.Roz get him on the phone and see if he can make the new date because we have decided to change the date of the Mela to 23rd April 2011 which from now on will be known as Abu Hamza Day rather than that horrible racist St Georges Day."

Sponsors of Mela

Cohesion Plus-Council Funded Race Hate Group.
Kent Police-Council Funded.
Kent Equality Cohesion group-Council Funded.
Arts Council England-Public Funded Quango.
Applause Touring-Bollocky Council funded "Aaaarts Group"
Tunbridge Wells Arts Partnership-Council Funded PC Bollocks.
Kent Childrens Trust-Council Funded child indoctrination organisation.

Yep that sounds really FREE doesnt it.
If these organisations have enough of our  money to spend on this bollocks then they deserve to lose all their funding and see whether they can raise the money the normal way .
Lesbo Roz
"Is that Banklays Bark this is Tunbridge Wells Council.Can you lend us a few hundred thousand pounds so we can brainwash the residents of Tunbridge Wells about the miracle of multicultural society in order that we can replace the democratic system with something akin to Communism (well actually it is communism).I assume the usual terms will apply in that we can piss it all up the wall and not have to pay a penny back."

Banklays Bark
"Your taking the piss now fuck off.Beeeeeeeeeeep."

Captains Swings black book.

Sir, Your name is down amongst the Black hearts in the Black Book and this is to advise you and the like of you  to make your wills. Ye have been the Blackguard Enemies of the People on all occasions, Ye have not yet done as ye ought,.... Swing


Original swing "threatening letter" dating back to the swing riots .


Has anyone got any information about swing riot activities in and around Rotherfield during the 1830s .



Private e mail me on cptswing@hotmail.co.uk  or post reply below.

Tunbridge Wells Borough Council are traitors.

Tunbridge Wells Borough Council should hang their heads in shame because they are truly a disgrace .
Yesterday was freedom day with local soldiers exercising their right to march through the town.

Due to the fact that the council failed to advertise the event other than on its own website resulted in a very poor turnout of members of the public to display support for our troops.The lack of advertising combined with a Grand Prix and the World Cup pretty much guaranteed that people wouldnt be around.

Contrast the lack of advertising given to freedom day with the wall to wall advertising that the retards in the town hall are giving to that traditional English event that is the Mela.Wherever you go there are adverts for this multi (foreign) cultural event plastered all over the place.The council have excelled themselves this year by getting young children (who should be in school) to parade around the town proclaiming the forthcoming celebration of cultures alien to us all in the name of diversity.The brainwashing of young children is about as low as you can go but that doesnt stop the  communists in the council from milking it for all its worth.Imagine the outcry if children were pulled out of school in order to promote an event that celebrates English culture , English history by English music and dance whilst having the opportunity to eat and drink traditional English foods.The bedwetting left would have a collective seizure if we were to do this so why is it acceptable to promote cultures with values totally different to our own and eat foods based on domestic canine pets that are guaranteed to give you Delhi belly for the rest of the weekend.
My advice would be to steer clear of the cultural chernobyl that is the Mela.

Tunbridge Wells is not culturally diverse in any shape or form and to rub the insanity of PC diversity bollocks into the noses of the predominately white English nominally christian polulation will do untold damage to what these days is called community cohesion but in the past was just letting people get on with their own lives without lesbian outreach workers telling you that some groups are special (black/asian/mussie) etc but some(white english christain) are scum.

If the council wants us to experience other cultures then perhaps they could go the whole hog and have public stoning of women in Calverley Park and have pcsos renamed as the religious Police who will beat the shit out of anyone who dares to think that Islam is a backward religious death cult which promotes the repression of women and the abuse of children.Only then will all the trendy "right on" types and their retarded supporters in the Town Hall realise that cultural diversity isnt all its made out to be after all.

Is it any coincidence that mela is an anagram for lame?.

Alderbrook on a good day.

Hope you all like the updated look.

Secondary school not second rate school.

June is upon us and just around the corner are the school summer holidays (also known as 100% increase in holiday prices holiday).Before you know it September will be here and the children will be back to school.
If your child is starting secondary school I hope you got allocated the school of your choice rather than the school that East Sussex Cunty Council wants to herd your child into.I have heard several stories about the councils admissions team being generally crap and operating a strict policy of every child in Crowborough goes to the Beacon whether you like it or not.If parents had the cheek to want a decent school for their children (not Beacon)the Council seems to go into full on punishment mode and allocate a place at Beacon anyway .If you appeal they then relent and allocate your child to a different school miles away ( i have heard mentioned that someone got "threatened with" an allocated space at a school in St Leonards!!!! some 40 miles away if they didnt accept the place at Beacon).

Those parents that dont give a shit and are happy for their children to go to the crappy local comprehensive will be happy but my sympathies go to those parents who wanted better for their child than Beacon but were forced there by the twats at the local authority.

So if your child has been allocated a place at Beacon I would recommend that you go and see your doctor now and get a stock of anti depressants in before you need them.

Obviously check to make sure your child has the right uniform (scruffy t shirt)and equipment before they attend their first day at Beacon.Luckily the school doesnt expect you to provide certain things that are essential equipment at the Beacon .These things include cigarettes and lighters which will have to be acquired by your child on the first day.The school is very generous however and will provide free razor blades to enable your child to slash their body to bits as well as encouraging the girls to have contraceptive implants fitted from age 13 so they can have underage sex.Parents dont have to worry though as you wont be aware of these things because the school wont actually tell you or ask you.Ignorance is bliss.

Good luck folks-you will need it.

A few lefty protesters shot by the IDF-not good enough.

The BBC and the guardianistas have been working themselves up into a orgasmic frenzy over the Gaza aid ship "incident".
Regardless of your personal views on the Arab/Israeli conflict I hope we can all agree that a few less stupid whining lefty mussie loving twats in the world is not a bad thing.
I think we can safely say that the "peace" protesters onboard probably made a severe misjudgement when they decided to attack Israeli commandos who just wanted a quick look at their cargo.Never has the saying "dont bring a knife to a gunfight" been more appropriate.

Personally I think the Israelis were quite restrained-hopefully next time they might like to utilise a couple of torpedoes a la North Korea and do us all a favour by taking the whole lot out.

Crowborough Town Council.

CTC has been looking for a weak minded individual to fill the vacant post of Town Clerk.

Their ideal candidate would be an easily pliable person who can turn a visually impaired eye to all the dodgy dealings that go on within the confines of the town hall.Unfortunately for the council the interviewed candidates were not prepared to be the gimp at the beck and call of their elected and unelected masters and were therefore not considered suitable.
The Town council are still looking for that elusive candidate that will not upset their apple cart.

Seeing the application from the point of view of a job applicant I can safely say that the Town Council are as good at recruiting staff as they are at saving the council taxpayers money.

So the search continues for a windowlicker who manages to maintain basic bodily functions but has limited mental capacity.Its a shame the councillors cannot apply for the job because they all fit the bill perfectly.Failing that the character pictured above seems ideal.